Well, it’s official. I have been declared “sane and responsible” by my school bus stop buddy, the clinical psychologist.
But… “Is that your professional opinion?” I asked.
“Uh, noooo,” he replied, and I almost thought he was going to ask me to set up a mental health checkup appointment with him. But he did not. Phew.
“Well,” I told him, changing the subject, “I went back to my one of old jobs this week. I am now a de-motivational speaker again. I have one client. She is nearly nine years old.”
Here’s how it works:
I step into my daughter’s room each morning and say, “‘Honey, it’s time to get up…. Is there anything I can help you w—”
“Go away, Mommy. I’m doing it myself.”
“I know. I just thought I could get breakfast for y—”
“No. I will do it.”
Technically, I guess it’s not so much me being “de-motivational” as it is me being able to successfully motivate a negative response.
The psychologist said, “Oh, it’s because you didn’t use the formula. You need to tell her that when she acts that way, she will lose something that’s important to her.” (Thus further solidifying my perception of him as someone I never would have wanted to date.)
Professional “formula” or not, I much prefer my quiet talks with my daughter, where we come to a mutual understanding about how to organize our day and relate to each other in moments of stress. Our conversations are usually spent snuggling, rather than pouting… and I think it’s much more important to make those memories with her, to support her inner strength and independence, and to validate her feelings… than to punish her by taking something away.
If she wants to do everything herself, so be it. I’m so proud of her for having the desire and ability to do so! And I trust her to come to me when she does need my help.
That’s just my personal opinion.
I realize this song has romantic intentions,
but please just ignore those overtones.
I am dedicating it to my daughter anyway.